by Robynn Jasper
Investigations Supervisor
Marion County Children Services

Child abuse and neglect is an ugly reality. It occurs more often than people like to believe.

A child is abused or neglected every 10 minutes in Ohio, according to Prevent Child Abuse Ohio. In Marion County, 325 children were found to have been abused or neglected in 2004. 

 During Child Abuse Prevention Month in April, we hear a lot about what adults can do to help prevent child abuse and neglect. But one area that is often overlooked is teaching children how to protect themselves.

 The U.S. Department of Health and Human Services reports that in 2002, more than 80 percent of perpetrators in child abuse and neglect cases were parents. Other relatives were perpetrators in 7 percent of the cases, and unmarried partners of parents accounted for 3 percent.

That means that 90 percent of the time, children who were being abused or neglected knew and trusted the person victimizing them.

 While teaching children about “stranger danger” is important, it obviously is not enough. What more can we do to protect children from abuse?

 We can teach them that all people, little kids especially, have a right to feel safe all the time. Even four and five-year-olds know the difference between feeling safe and feeling scared. Teach them that if they ever don’t feel safe with someone, even someone they know, they can and should do something about it.

Make sure that children know it is ok to say “NO!” to anyone who is doing something that hurts or scares them or that they don’t feel right about. Have them practice saying “NO!” in a loud voice, using body language to show that they mean what they say.

 Talk to them about how to get away from someone who is hurting or scaring them. Tell them that if they have to, they should scream or make a lot of noise, spill or break something, or even kick or bite the person. Then they should get away to a safe place. Talk about safe places they could go such as their home, their school, a friend or neighbor’s house, a nearby church or store, or a police or fire station.

 Help children understand that no matter what someone may do to them, it is never their fault. They need to protect themselves by telling someone they trust what has happened. If the person they tell doesn’t pay attention to them or believe them, emphasize that they should tell someone else, and keep telling until they find someone who listens. 

 Another important safety lesson that young children can understand is to talk about secrets. Let them know that any secret that hurts or scares them or that they don’t feel good about is not a good secret and should not be kept. Teach them that they should always tell secrets like that, no matter what the person might have said to try to keep them quiet. 

 Teaching children about safety is not a one time discussion. It should be talked about on a regular basis. A good way to do this is to practice “what if” situations with them.

Turn a trip to the local store into a teachable moment by asking children “what if you got lost and couldn’t find me?” Then, point out how to identify a store clerk by the uniform and/or name tag and take them to the clerk or a check out counter where they would ask for help.

An important aspect of protecting children is empowering them with the skills they need to get help if anyone tries to victimize them in any way. It’s amazing the difference it can make when children know that it is ok to stand up for and protect themselves anytime they don’t feel safe.

 Marion County Children Services offers a preschool safety program to local day care centers and preschools that teaches children these and other safety strategies. This spring, we have met with over 350 preschoolers to talk about these issues, using the Red Flag Green Flag® ABCs of Personal Safety curriculum. If you are interested in getting copies of the materials or having a presentation done for a group of children, call Children Services’ Community Education Office at 740-389-2317, ext. 129.

Marion County Children Services is a nationally accredited child protective services agency that leads the community in the prevention, identification, and protection of abused and neglected children. Children Services coordinates intervention and support services in partnership with families and other community resources, working together to assure that Marion County children are safe and have permanent and stable homes